According to Moonalice legend, when your bowl is filled with the good stuff, you smoke it. But when your bowl is completely full of shit, call Joe the Plummer.

According to Moonalice legend, the area around Live Oak, Florida has been home to native tribes going back a very long time. How long? When the first Moonalice tribe members showed up, the place was called Little Acorn. Unfortunately, the tribe proved to be allergic to Spanish moss. No matter how the tribe cured it, Spanish moss provided an unsatisfactory smoking experience. All cough, no buzz. And so the tribe left this area to the Seminoles and the white men. Y'all have done a fine job with it!

According to Moonalice legend, most members of the tribe maintain their amateur status. One exception, however, comes when the going gets weird. When the going gets weird, the whole tribe turns pro. Thanks to the election campaign, the tribe's pro status has come in very handy. One party is talking about Pro Americans, and we're here to answer the call. We're Americans and we're pros. Put us in coach!